Irony
by thatguywhowrote
Summary: "Which was ironic, actually. I did so well in convincing myself I was happy and contented with my decision that I failed to realize I wasn't really the one who needed help from falling any deeper." [One-shot, Kirino's POV]


_**A/N:**_ _After 7 and a half months, I finally got this one done. This was supposed to be my first submission, but the other one got finished first and I never really got into writing the ending for this one (something about not me being satisfied at whatever ending I had given to this before)._

 _This story is under a first person point-of-view, something I am not quite used to, and this was also written way before I wrote my first one-shot So Close Yet So Far, so the quality should be different and I can't guarantee if it's good or not (was good for me, at least). I did not edit much out of it as I wanted to preserve most of what was in here, save for the grammar errors and stuff. And as usual, this takes place after the anime/LN's ending._

 _Wanna thank some people first, KaiSaeren for betareading this work. Thanks for taking time off your schedule for this! Shout out to Mister Squatch as well, his story_ _ **Promises**_ _is one of my inspirations in writing this, the other being Season 1's OP, so thank you as well!_

 _ **Disclaimer:**_ _I don't own OreImo._

The day was Sunday, which marked the thirteenth day since that incident.

I wasted no time registering myself in the visitor's log book, filling out the form with my information in an almost illegible fashion. Setting the pen down and thanking the receptionist I then went on my way, walking down the same path that I had already memorized after multiple visits, it still holding the same dreadful feeling in the air as the first time I had laid foot here.

But it was no surprise, really. I mean, this _was_ a hospital after all.

I treaded silently towards my destination, my eyes scanning my surroundings. The floor was covered in alternating white and grey tiles, oddly spotless despite the volume of people that I saw come and go. The fluorescent lamps that lined the roof along the halls shone brightly, enough to make the white painted walls emit a glow that would hurt one's eyes if you stared at it for quite some time. There was also the occasional voice speaking over the intercom, calling the attention of concerned staff regarding an emergency or something, ending with a chime before going back to play an eerily soothing music.

Then there were the numerous doctors and nurses that littered the place, painfully reminding me of those words that one doctor had told us back then:

" _He is still unconscious; though he did not suffer any fatal injuries and is now in a more stable condition, we have no certainty on when he will wake up... "_

I had never seen Dad so furious before, his eyes at that time burned with a rage that could cause anyone's knees to tremble. A vein on his temple twitched while his hands formed fists begging to thrash about at any moment. He was even more frightening than the time he found out about my hobby by catching the ' _Let's Make Love With Little Sister!'_ CD from me. He looked like he was about to unleash his anger on the doctor with his labored breathing but my Mom, who had been crying ever since we had set foot on this place, rushed to his side and hugged him tightly as if to subdue the beast trying to break free from within.

That was when I saw my Dad — for the first in what was considerably a long time — break down and cry his eyes out.

Of course I cried too! I may often be cold-hearted towards him but deep down I had only acted tough because I knew he would belittle me if I showed signs of weakness. Or maybe I just didn't like him worrying about me...

Okay, maybe getting a littleworried is okay, but I didn't want him to worry _that_ much.

Though stupid, perverted and most of the time useless, he was still my aniki. He was still the one I idolized back then when we were younger. He was the first person who found out and I confessed to about my otaku side. He was the one who helped me find friends since I had no one else to talk to about my hobbies, defended my eroge collection against Dad even if it meant he had to take the blame, fixed my relationship with Ayase when I was on the brink of losing hope, catered to my every whim despite him losing face or getting hurt in the process, and even confessed to me out in public in a manner which I still feel both creeped out about and somehow proud of.

Most of all, he was the aniki I fell in love with; though I did love him more than any normal younger sister ever should, I still loved him just as much nonetheless.

Deep in thought, I suddenly found myself staring at the label that read "Room 403" for some time now. My hands clasped the doorknob waiting for my command to turn it but I failed. All the desire to come here, the longing to see him again, to say things I know would only fall on deaf ears at his present state... all of them were quickly fading.

Because I knew once I open the door and enter the room, stand at the foot of his bed and see him in his current condition, the words I had uttered a month ago would come back to forever haunt me once more.

" _This... is all my fault."_

I gritted my teeth as I felt my grip on the handle tighten. I wanted to turn back and run. Run away from all of this. Go back to the confines of our home and retreat to the safety of my room. Hide under the sheets and lull myself to sleep in order to escape the painful reality.

I just wanted to disappear!

But a voice in my head urged me on, letting me recall the lessons learned from the past, so with a deep breath I mustered the strength to tilt my hand and with a click, I unlocked the door.

Upon intruding I was surprised to see a familiar figure looking back at me, she sat on a chair at one side of Kyousuke's bed. Her eyes donned red contact lens that stared with the usual, indifferent gaze, framed by long, black hair. Her petite body clad in a white, frilly blouse worn underneath a black gothic dress that perfectly accentuated her ghostly pale complexion. A mole under one eye was the only mark on her otherwise flawless skin.

"Oh, umm..." I gently closed the door behind me, grabbed another chair and slowly made my way beside her to sit. "I didn't expect you'd be here Kuroneko."

"I was supposed to come here with Saori, but unfortunately she had other urgent matters to attend to. Also, I have foreseen your coming here however..." Her eyes squinted as she examined my face with a slightly quizzical look, "I did not expect you to arrive in such a weakened state. I had known you more of the type to feign toughness, even at times of trials."

"What? What are you-" I wiped my face with one hand and only then did I notice the dried-up tears that stained my cheeks. I took out my handkerchief and quickly wiped my already crimson face clean, all the while hiding my embarrassment from her catching a glimpse of my weakness at the moment. "D-don't misunderstand things, I wasn't crying! I just... got something in my eye, t-that's all!"

"My my, and I thought after everything that's been said and done you would have at least learned to be more honest, even with yourself. It appears I am proven wrong." Kuroneko shook her head in disappointment. I wasn't in any mood to retort so after she spoke the room had fallen into complete silence.

Watching her now reconfirmed that it always was hard to tell how she felt; her face only showed the same, non-caring expression she normally had for just about anything. She had her eyes closed, like she was deep in thought or in the midst of meditation. Or maybe she was assessing the situation, waiting for a cue on whether she or I should break the ice.

Geez. Even for a fellow girl, deciphering her was unusually hard.

"What is it?" I was too preoccupied that I didn't notice she had already looked my way, her head tilted with one eyebrow slightly raised.

"N-nothing," I muttered before the loss of words once again filled the room. She sighed and resumed her previous activity while I instead moved my gaze onto Kyousuke's sleeping form.

His chest rose and sank slowly in rhythm with his respiration, the mask attached to him feeding oxygen to ensure he had enough supply. His face, save for the few scratches here and there, wore a peaceful guise as if he was not undergoing any form of suffering. His head still had the bandages wrapped, which now had none of the previous dried blood stains. His complexion had appeared paler now, and his cheek bones also seem to be more prominent than before. His body was covered by a thick blanket to ward off the cold blasts from the room's air-conditioning, but both his arms laid by his side in plain view. Tracing one down to the hand I saw a needle inserted under his skin at the wrist, attached to a tube that connected a container filled with clear liquid slowly dripping down.

I winced at the sight, he didn't show it now but I had no idea how much pain he clearly had been in. He never did get used to my beatings nor to Ayase's kicks, and I'm not sure if he's some kind of masochist with how he always got into harm's way with his actions. Such was the foolhardy brother he was, his stubbornness equally rivalling mine. Whenever he was pushed down, he always stood back up - maybe he stumbled a bit in the process, but he never failed to do so despite how much trouble he's been through and how much obstacles were still ahead of him.

Except for now. Like before, he knew he was not invincible, so he was bound to stay down someday. But I didn't expect it to be like this. He can't leave me behind, he can't just... d-die like this, not after all we've been through.

 _'Wake up Kyousuke... Please, don't die on me. I'm begging you, I don't want to live my whole life blaming myself that-'_

"This is all my fault." My eyes shot open in surprise, releasing the hold I unknowingly had on welled-up tears to freely flow down my face. It was Kuroneko, her head hung low as she whispered just loud enough for me to hear, eyes half-lidded and fixed on Kyousuke. Her face didn't display much evidence, but her words sounded very pained and guilty. "That one night... I cursed all of the lovers in this world, cursed them with all the hatred in my entire being for my fate. I never thought my powers had evolved into a force so strong it would turn out to thi-"

"SHUT UP!" I barked at her in a burst of anger. I stood up with one finger pointed at her, knocking my chair down. Kuroneko seemed taken aback with a mixed expression of shock and confusion. "Don't you dare give me that, that... _chuunibyou_ crap! That's the last thing I want to hear from you, those stupid, immature, teen-complex emo nonsense!"

My voice shook as I yelled, glaring at my friend with the pent-up anger on myself that she had the misfortune of receiving. My breathing was heavy and labored, like I had finished practicing for track. She didn't say anything back though, instead she bit her lip before turning her eyes away from me. That hurt look from her woke me up from my rage, only then realizing I had said some painful words at one of my dearest friends. Regret washed over me like a wave of cold water and no sooner did I apologize to her.

"Kuroneko, I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"It's okay." She cut me off in her casual tone, finally recovering from my childish outburst and returning to her nonchalant expression. "I guess you're right, this is probably something that lies outside my influence. I too apologize, however I am still clueless as to what has caused this tragedy." She averted her eyes, clearly avoiding mine as she pressed me with a question she seemed reluctant to ask. "Perhaps you can enlighten me on the situation?"

It was my turn to be shocked. After what I said she had simply shrugged it off and apologized? Not to mention it's been so long since everything happened, and she still didn't know? Was this girl really the Kuroneko I know? But wait, more important matters were at hand...

"You mean... nobody told you yet?"

"I'm afraid so. I didn't want to bring this up because I know it isn't easy, but I want to know." She made eye-contact with me and somehow I could tell not as Kuroneko, but as Gokou Ruri. "No. I _have_ to know."

This time I could make out some worry in her eyes, but whether they were for Kyousuke's well-being, mine or for us both, that much I couldn't tell. Figuring I owed her this for acting immaturely, I propped the chair back up and took a deep sigh as I readied myself to recall the events.

"Very well," I cleared my throat and began, "I guess we could start after our circle's meeting in Akiba..."

When we got back from Akihabara it was already past 5:00PM, we found a note saying that Mom and Dad had gone out. Seeing the safety of our parents' absence, Kyousuke collapsed on the couch under the weight of the paper bags without the worry of being seen with such things. He had been carrying them since we went on our way home, and I was glad he was there for me since I doubt I could do the same without breaking my back in the process. He stretched his arms and back before settling down to a slouched position, his head held up by the chin with an elbow set above his knee. I was on my way to my room when something important crossed my mind.

"Hey," I called him as I was about to pass through the living room door. With my back towards him, I turned my head only enough to catch a glimpse of him from the corner of my eye. "Later at my room. We'll talk."

"Yeah, yeah." He lazily replied, eyes still closed and not even moving from his current position. With that I headed towards my room and sat down on my bed to rest and ponder.

Normally I wouldn't waste a moment to play my newly bought eroge, but I found myself nowhere close the mood to do so. It was the same feeling I had when Kyousuke and I were in the hotel, something was bugging me and I needed some sort of reassurance to calm my nerves. As I touched the part of my cheek where he kissed me, a thought came into mind and I feared for the worst. I wrapped my arms around my body and shivered at the idea.

 _'Could it be that he's going to wish f-f-for..._ that _?!'_ He did previously mention that such a one-time wish was best for doing perverted things, but was he actually serious?!

No, wait. This _was_ Kyousuke we're talking about; he's a massive, perverted siscon who's been sexually harassing my friends all the time! He's probably had a couple of dirty thoughts prepared already. A horrible chill ran down my spine at the thought of him staring at me with hungry, lustful eyes, hands moving towards me with malicious intent, threatening to rip my clothes apart...

 _'NO!'_ I mentally screamed as I curled into a ball, wrapping my arms around my body protectively. _'He can't! N-not now, at least... A-and not like that! I-I'm not ready yet...'_

I shook the thoughts out of my head and tried to occupy my mind with something else. Deciding I first needed to change my clothes to forget today's events, I settled with my comfortable light blue pajama shirt and shorts. The soft, cottony feel of the fabric against my skin brought about a soothing warmth that calmed my nerves a bit.

 _'Okay good, what's next? I could talk to Saori or Kuroneko about something else to get my mind off of it, dammit where did I put my phone...'_

 _*knock knock*_

"Kirino, it's me. Can you let me in?" I jumped in surprise letting out a small squeak, I was still bent over my bed searching among the sheets when his knocking made my hand flail up.

 _'C-crap! That idiot, he came too soon! Wait, I have to stay calm..._ ' I took a deep breath and put on my best scowl, crossing my arms as I sat myself down on my chair. _'Focus...'_

"Come in."

On my cue, he managed to open the door with all my things balanced in his arms. I remained silent, my eyes watching him behave like a wary animal entering unfamiliar territory. Cautiously, he chose to sit down on his usual spot on the floor and set my things aside. As soon as his eyes met mine we immediately looked away from each other, feeling my face begin to heat up as a blush crept its way.

There was a deafening silence, heavy tension hanging in the air of my room. Neither of us moved, spoke nor looked at each other, but the nervousness causing my heart to start racing got the better of me.

 _'The sooner we end this, the sooner I can get to play my eroge. I can't have my precious imoutos waiting too long for me.'_

"Explain," I broke our stalemate with a single word that seemed to echo from the walls. He was dumbfounded, mumbling something inaudible before finally speaking up.

"Explain... what, exactly?"

Seriously, was I that vague or was he really this dense? How could he forget about that so easily? I shot him a glare, to which he gulped as if waiting for his punishment.

"Earlier in Akiba! Th-that... k-kiss, explain!" His face blushed at the memory, but he slowly smiled as he scratched the back of his head.

"Oh, that... Well, I was about to tell you what I wanted for my one-time wish but figured that out in the public wasn't really the best place to do it. I mean, there were a lot of people around, wouldn't want them to see or hear us." I sank in my seat at his words, eyes widening while my heart started thumping fast and loud.

 _'F-f-for real?!'_

"Y-you! What the hell are you planning?!" I grabbed my pillow and threw it at him forcefully, he took it to the face and fell flat on his back. "H-how could you! To ask your little sister to do s-such... p-p-perverted things!"

"What? What are you talking about?!" He sat back up and rubbed the back of his head. "I wasn't going to ask you anything perverted!"

"Liar! Pervert! Siscon! Exhibitionist! Go crawl into a hole and die in it!" I yelled back at him, frantically looking for more things to throw at him.

Don't get me wrong! I love him, but I would NEVER give him myself on such a whim! That's just way too low, even for Kyousuke!

"W-wait! Calm down! And will you put that down?!" He shielded himself with his arms for another possible barrage, my hand positioned for attack with my clock as the projectile. "Just listen to me for once, will you!?"

"FINE!" I slammed my alarm clock down on my desk then sat down on my bed with my arms crossed. "This better be good, or else." He flinched at my last statement, but cleared his throat as he began retelling what happened on that fateful night.

It all started in that hotel room we shared on Christmas Eve.

Kyousuke had just confessed to me a while ago, albeit in an embarrassing, scandalous manner. I was genuinely happy since I had planned to do the same, but he beat me to it.

Well, not before he had chased me around the streets of Akihabara like a lunatic. It was due to a big misunderstanding that thankfully, was fixed through the meddling of our friends.

I had already given thought on what events could possibly transpire once I had confessed to him, whether it turns out to be unrequited love or not. Even though I always told him not to mix 2D and 3D especially regarding siblings falling in love, I couldn't stand not telling him how I truly felt. I had kept quiet, suppressing my feelings for him for all those years, masking them as disgust and hatred instead. But I knew my own emotions better than anyone else, that those were just futile efforts on what was the inevitable. My feelings would one day rise above the surface, break through the wall I had kept up for so long and undoubtedly reach out to him.

I had been playing eroge for quite a long time now, most of them involving little sisters falling for their older brothers. Weird as it is, I always imagined myself to be the older brother, or that "I was Kyousuke and not Kirino," while the little sisters in the game were another "me" instead. I envied how the protagonists did everything in the name of love, how the little sisters could express their true feelings and have them reciprocated, how those routes with good endings showed the siblings happily together.

But that was it. They confess, they become a couple, they live happily ever after. End of story. Nothing else showed after that.

They were alone in their own fantasy, so it seems.

Some friends may accept it, but what about their parents? Disowned, probably. And what about the law, wasn't incest a crime?

I knew it was all too good to be true. Something like this could never last forever, let alone for long. So while we were together, I leaned onto Kyousuke's ear and offered him a deal spoken in a hushed whisper...

 _'Until we graduate,_

 _The two of us will be lovers for a limited time._

 _We'll enjoy ourselves to the fullest. Then once we graduate..._

 _...we go back to being normal siblings.'_

I waited for his answer, to which he promptly gave his agreement with a smile.

So that was that, it was official. We were a couple now. In a relationship. Not as siblings, but as lovers.

 **BUT**.

Only for a limited time.

As much as it had pained me to know we wouldn't last for long, and that he had accepted my offer without much hesitation, it couldn't be helped. This was so we would not get caught by our parents or other people if it dragged on for too long, since all secrets were revealed in time. This was so I wouldn't hold Kyousuke back, especially since he's already going to start college soon. This was so we can move on with our own lives in the future on whatever we wanted to do without any regrets.

Or at least, that's what I kept telling myself.

I knew what my ulterior motive for that promise was, it was to prevent myself from falling any deeper into our relationship. Indulging on this taboo for a few months should be enough to satisfy my craving for my lifetime, so that I wouldn't one day look back on this and regret not pursuing my happiness.

Which was ironic, actually. I did so well in convincing myself I was happy and contented with my decision that I failed to realize I wasn't really the one who needed help from falling any deeper.

"So Kirino, my one-time wish is for you to break our promise."

"..."

I didn't know how I would react to him. Sure, I was relieved that he wasn't planning on getting his hands up my shirt, but...

"...w-why?" I stuttered as my lips quivered, my rage long quelled after Kyousuke retold our past together. I had already set up everything perfectly to stop us from taking this forbidden path. It was so hard to force myself to accept that things will end when the time came. And yet here he was, effortlessly trampling over the barrier I had painstakingly put up to stop this madness. Why did he always have to be so stupid and go ruin everything again?

"Because I love you Kirino. That's why." And with those words, all the feelings I had held back with great effort instantaneously gained the strength to break free from their shackles, hitting me with the undeniable truth. "If you're not the one for me, then I would rather have no one else."

I didn't know what to do anymore, he was far too deep in this grave we dug for us that he was beyond help's reach. Part of me was happy, wanting to jump around and scream his name at the top of my lungs. But the other part was horrified, seeing my worst fear had come to life as the direst consequence of my course of action. Kyousuke had already stood up and approached me, pulling me to a hug with one hand rubbing my back. My arms began to move involuntarily to hug him back but at the last moment I managed to force myself to push him away instead.

"No... This isn't right." His eyes widened at my response. I backed away from him and turned my gaze elsewhere, unable to look straight at him now. "What we're doing... what we're feeling, this... this isn't normal! We can't go on like this! If... if Mom and Dad found out..."

"They won't, we just have to be careful." He replied rather reassuringly, but I was far from convinced.

"Yes they will! Sooner or later, they will! You found out about my hobby, Dad did too. D-did you see how mad he was at you and me? I can't let you take the heat for me like that again! What more do you think, if he found out we were doing things as more than siblings! H-he'll kill us!"

"So? Then we'll leave!" He shouted back with determination flaring in his eyes, "We'll leave this place, it will be just you and me then! We can let things cool down for a while, and then when they're ready we can sit down and talk about a compromise if possible."

"That'll never happen, they'll never let us be together..." I more of spat the words out due to the conflict with my response and my feelings. "Look, you don't have to do this for me. I've done nothing but take you for granted and hurt you with my selfishness. The least I can do is have you sell away your possible future for my own personal interests."

Our parents had begun to look down on you when I became an over-achiever in school, track and modelling, while you went downhill becoming the slacker you were as we grew separated.

Ayase had seen you as a sexual harasser and a massive siscon, disgusted at your mere presence because you diverted her anger from me to keep our friendship intact.

Kuroneko had broken up with you because she knew it made me unhappy, even if she still harbors feelings for you, which you rejected when she confessed to you once more for my sake.

That plain girl got mad at you after choosing me over her, your childhood friend who's always been there for you in your times of need. She practically begged you to love her back when she told you her feelings. Still you turned your back on her just so you could be with me.

And me?

"What good did I ever bring to you? All I were to you was nothing but a cause for suffering and trouble." I clenched my fists so hard I could feel my nails digging through my skin, but the sharp pain in my chest from the harshness of the truth was nothing compared to it. "You always went out of your way for me, no matter the cost. But what did I ever do for you? Nothing. I don't deserve you... So just forget about me, forget about everything that's ever happened between us. This was all just a dream! That's right, an awful dream! So wake up to the truth and-"

"Enough!" Kyousuke shouted, this time was different. He sounded angry, a rare sight since he was usually passive and accepted how things flowed. He began to cry, but in his eyes burned a will that said he would not take this sitting down. "I don't care! All those girls confessed to me, and I made myself clear! I told them once, and I'll tell them a million times," he breathed in deep before he yelled back with the same ferocity,

"I LOVE MY LITTLE SISTER, AND THAT WILL NEVER CHANGE!"

There was silence after his emotional roar. He gasped for air, face red in embarrassment. I began to feel light-headed, my brain overloading with emotions while his words were still ringing in my ears. I felt myself growing distant from reality, my consciousness like the flickering flame of a candle. I didn't realize he was approaching me once more, placing his hands on my shoulders as he peered into my eyes. I shuddered at his touch, my thoughts pulled back to reality.

"Please Kirino... just answer me. Is it a yes or a no?"

It was too late, he was hopeless. But all he wanted was an answer right? Just like in my eroge I had two choices before me where I had to pick one.

But this was real life. There were no load or save options, this was a one-shot that could never be replayed, so I had to be careful.

If I said yes, then we would be lovers again. I'd get to hold his hand again, feel his arms around me in an embrace. We could even share another kiss or two. I would have him all to myself, even if it were just us who knew about it. It didn't matter, if he was by my side I needed nothing else.

But once we're found out...

If I said no... I don't even know if he'd agree to it. But hopefully he'd keep his word, and we would return to being normal siblings living normal lives. That's what he wanted before, right? No, that was what _I_ wanted for us. To live a plain, normal life, a boring existence.

Even if it meant living a life full of lies.

 _'But I do owe him this since this was his one-time wish...'_ I bit my lip at that point. Kyousuke then knelt down before me, eyes staring at me as they desperately sought for an answer. He then bowed down so that his forehead touched the floor.

"Please, Kirino..."

To say he looked pitiful was a complete understatement, lowering himself as much as possible to beg for my approval. I could only imagine how painful it must be for him to wait in suspense, given there was still the possibility of another rejection. He sacrificed everything he had just to be with me, so if I were to deny his request then he would be left with nothing.

The choices once more flashed in my head: Y **es** or N **o**. Amidst the storm of my thoughts as I was torn between the two, I saw something else. I focused my attention on what appeared to be something comparable to a glitch in an eroge and was presented with a new, third option:

 **RUN.**

Next thing I realized, I was panting by the doorframe heading out of the house. As I pulled myself together, it only took Kyousuke's voice yelling 'wait' from upstairs to bring me back to the current situation. Without a second thought I ran as fast as I could while my older brother followed suit. It was like before when we were younger, except this time I was the one outrunning him as he lagged behind.

Having no clear destination in mind, I let my legs carry me to wherever it decided. It was getting dark, there weren't many people outside so it wasn't hard to move around the streets. My body finally gave in to exhaustion when I reached a stoplight near a pedestrian lane. I leaned against the post to catch my breath to see Kyousuke running up to me in a sluggish jog. We were both tired, our knees trembling while our feet ached. I didn't have enough energy left so I had no choice but to remain where I stood, steeling myself for another encounter with him.

No matter how much I ran even to the point of reaching the limits of my stamina in hopes of escaping my problems, I felt like I had never really gotten farther, or anywhere for that matter. Everything felt just like the way they were before, as if I hadn't moved from the start. Irony seemed to be the theme of my life recently.

"P-please Kirino," he said in-between pants, "don't run from me anymore. J-just tell me your answer, and I promise I will respect your decision."

He'd respect my decision? So if I said no... Would he really stop pursuing me? I mean, that was what I wanted, right? That we stop this nonsense before we get caught. Before we hurt ourselves. He had lots of options after this anyway, he could reconcile with that plain girl, he could choose to go out with Ayase, or even return to being a couple with Kuroneko...

 _'Yes,'_ my tears began to fall at my forced betrayal to myself, _'that's how it should be... that's what I want for us...'_

I opened my mouth to speak but no words ever came out, only looking stupid with my jaw hanging. I just couldn't do it, knowing that one part of me would damn the other on either of the answers. I took the same option again, turning back to run but Kyousuke leapt forward and managed to grab me by my wrist.

"Kirino! Wait! I-" his grip was too weak, being worn down from all the running. My hand broke free from his grasp but in return I lost my balance and stumbled to my knees in the middle of the road, followed by the mad honking of a car's horn. I looked up to my horror to see a speeding vehicle heading straight towards me. My body froze in place, and even if I moved now it would still not be enough to get up and move out of the way.

 _'Is this how it ends?'_ I thought as time seemed to slow down around me. Maybe death was my true escape from reality. This was probably my fault for exploiting something of a glitch, the ultimate price would be to lose something valuable such as my life. I closed my eyes, the events from the past flashing in my mind as I braced myself for impact.

Surprisingly, it didn't hurt that much as I thought it would. As I got hit, I was thrown away and rolled for a few times before coming to a stop. I still even had my consciousness... wait. I don't feel anything broken either.

I opened my eyes to find myself lying sideways on the sidewalk, a few people looking concerned at me while some had terrified faces. A few seconds and it hit me. Adrenaline rushed throughout me and got me on my feet, ignoring the pain of the scratches and bruises beginning to form on my body. I stared in horror at the car that had parked itself on the middle of the road, wherein a few meters away laid a still body illuminated by the car's headlights.

"Kyousu... ke?" I moved forward one step at a time, my gaze locked at him. My breathing became faster as realization set in. I rushed towards him, numbed of pain I recently felt and broke down at his state.

He was lying on his back, his limbs didn't bend in the wrong directions but I couldn't tell if he had any broken bones. His eyes were closed but his face was contorted to one under extreme suffering, eyebrows furrowed as he gritted his teeth. Then I saw the blood staining the road coming from under his head. I paled at the sight, my vision was starting to blur when he spoke.

"Ki... rino... a-are you... hurt..." He didn't open his eyes, only blinking harder at the movement of his mouth. This idiot, to care for my well-being after being hit by a car! "I told you... not to run... stupid."

"I-I'm sorry!" I took his hand and squeezed it tightly, completely disregarding the chances of doing him more harm. "L-listen to me, m-my answer is yes! I've decided already, I want us to be together again! I'll do anything Kyousuke, I promise I'll be a better person for you, so p-please... just don't leave me...!" My voice went softer as I began to choke on my sobs, the thought of him dying because of me struck me with such crushing guilt. At that rate, I couldn't call an ambulance since I was barely understandable. I have never felt so helpless in my entire life.

"R-really... S-so this means we c-can go out again... as a c-c-couple?" He still spoke, grunting in pain between a few words before letting out a soft chuckle. I shushed him but he smiled at me and slowly opened one eye to see my face. "D-don't cry Kirino... What if I can't be there for you anymore... to wipe your tears?" He gathered his remaining strength to wipe some off my cheek before his arm became limp and fell back to the ground with a thud.

"N-no... Kyousuke! Come on, wake up!" I nudged him lightly, but he made no reaction. "This isn't funny! Please, talk to me Kyousuke!" I squeezed his hand, but again I got nothing in return. "You can't die right now! I-I answered yes, I take back everything I said, can you hear me?! I'm sorry! I'm sorry for always hurting you, so please!" I buried my face on his chest as hard as I can and pulled him towards me, as if I was closing the growing gap between us.

I wanted to blame him for everything up to this point, but I knew this was all my fault even if I hated to admit it.

"Please Kyousuke... take responsibility!"

My eyes were burning, my handkerchief too wet to dry away my tears anymore. I simply hung my head low, the burden of guilt weighing down on me harder than ever after revisiting those painful memories. I couldn't bear to face Kuroneko now, not when she could see how weak I was. Not to mention she was probably angry at me right now for knowing what happened.

"I don't blame you." Those were the first things she said after my story after remaining quiet while listening. I shot my head up to look at her, I swore she should have been mad at me after what I did, but she seemed upset instead. Her eyes looked moist, for once hinting on how she felt.

"Even if you don't... it doesn't change the fact that this was my fault."

"Even so." She responded back quickly. "Even if I saw the flaws in your actions, even if I thought you were an idiot for what you did, even if you did put his life in danger, and even if I can't find a reason as to really why," she looked up to me and gave me a weak smile. "I don't blame you."

I didn't know how to answer to that so I simply nodded in silence and cleaned my face, my friend consoling me as she rubbed my back. After a while we both found ourselves staring at Kyousuke again, but not as hard for me to do as before.

It was my fault, I now accepted that fact that it can't be changed no matter the amount of tears I shed or regret I felt. I couldn't turn back time to undo what happened, but I could still make up for it in the future. I promised to be a good girlfriend, I promised to share the pain instead of letting him suffer everything alone for my sake.

Most importantly, I promised to love him forever.

"So, what now?" Kuroneko asked, stopping my train of thought. "Once he wakes up, what are you going to do?"

"That is..." I felt myself finally able to genuinely smile after quite a while. "I will say yes to his wish once more, so we can cherish each moment together to the fullest."

"I see." Her reply was short, but her smile guaranteed me it was what she wanted to hear.

"Thank you."

"Huh?" Kuroneko looked surprised, her face blushing. "W-what on earth are you thanking me for?"

"It's just that..." I was cut short by a groan. Our heads both turned to see it came from Kyousuke. His fingers began to twitch as he struggled to open his eyes.

"D-d-d-doctor!" Kuroneko stammered, but she was too shocked to move so I got up immediately and ran out the door. I asked every staff I came across on where I could seek help, a nurse behind a counter finally told me to return to the room as she paged the doctor on the situation.

 _'Finally, Kyousuke... you're awake!'_ Tears of joy began to form in my eyes but I let them flow freely. I took out my phone and called Dad to inform them, he said he'd be leaving from work as soon as possible and would be fetching Mom on the way. I couldn't contain my excitement anymore so I ran back towards the room, opening the door I saw Kuroneko standing aside however...

"Kuroneko?" Calling her name caught her by surprise for some reason and she faced me with a worried look, like she had just witnessed something awful. "H-hey, what's with that face?" She pointed towards his bed, speechless. I walked over to him, his half-opened eyes turning to me as I sat by his bedside.

"Kyousuke?" I placed one of my hands on his, careful not to move him too much. "How do you feel?" His eyes moved around as if he was inspecting me.

"Kirino, he..." Kuroneko paused, before she could resume Kyousuke had already opened his mouth. The way he squinted at me brought about a bad feeling as he struggled to speak up.

With his raspy voice, he uttered the words that once again effortlessly tore down everything I had prepared up to this point.

"Who... are you?"


End file.
